Sunday, May 27, 2007

Location, Location, Location

Big weekend here. We completed the purchase of some fine Bergen County (NJ) real estate. Nothing built on the property yet, and we're not planning on developing it for a while. Still, it's in a beautiful part of the state, right next to a golf course, and the area is quiet and private.
 
Ok, ok. It's a cemetery plot.
 
You might be thinking it's a little creepy to hold in your hands the very pieces of dirt they're going to be shoveling onto you, and I admit it gives one pause. I've seen the subtle recoil in several friends when I've mentioned the purchase to them. Buying it just seemed like a good idea after we counted the graves, both occupied and reserved, in the plot my grandmother bought years ago, and found there was one left for about six of us. (You want creepy? Now that's creepy.) Besides, everyone - even if they're horizontal - has to be somewhere. My main focus now is not to die within the next ten days, before the check clears.
 
I got to visit it yesterday, meet the neighbors, that sort of thing. It's in a new area of the memorial park, so many of the nearby plots aren't sold yet or, at the very least, haven't had anybody (perhaps that should be any body) move in. The plot is only 20 or 25 feet off the roadway, so if my kids can develop a good hook shot they won't even have to get out of the car to leave flowers.
 
If all goes well we won't be sowing anything there, as it were, any time soon. In the meantime, it seems a bit of a shame to let prime real estate sit unused. One idea I had was to put a metal storage shed there while we're, well, waiting. Keep the kids' bicycles there, the snow shovels, things like that. When the time comes, we can just clear out the stored items, or maybe just push them to the side, spray paint my name on the front and have a very reasonably priced mausoleum.
 
Another question I have to find out about: is our ownership limited to the first six feet of depth? It may not seem important now, but if oil or gold is ever discovered there it's going to matter.
 
Have I considered avoiding all of this by being cremated? Yes, but I quickly dispelled the idea. I just don't see the point of burning twice.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think you should turn it into an allotment, if you have them. It sounds a mighty fine lump of fertile ground!
Gaz ;-)

Anonymous said...

::cacklechoke::  burning twice....  I'll bring some good chocolate if you bring the marshmallows and graham crackers  

;-P

~Amy

Anonymous said...

It sounds like you would have been a proponent of the rural cemetary, a popular movement in the 19th century.  Cemetaries were designed not just as places for the dead, but also for the living.  People went to cemetaries for picnics in the summer and so on.  In Troy, where I live, there is a spectacular rural cemetary called Oakwood Cemetary.  It contains acres of rolling lawn, full of mature trees and other flora, not to mention some pretty awesome mausoleums and monuments.  It also contains the grave of Samuel Wilson, better known to us as "Uncle Sam."  So maybe you should start having picnics on your plot.  You can enjoy the property while you're still here, and it will most likely have the added benefit of completely mortifying your children.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps plant a Weeping willow tree at what would be the head of the graves. You can nuture it as it grows throughout your life. In the end you have something that would always weep at your passing.....(winks). (Hugs) You have been rather sparse these past few months, hope you know your missed. Wishing you love and peace! Indigo